Basic Training Reflection 1

[From PFC Christopher J. Goodale. October 2, 2009. Pics posted from Family Day and graduation at Fort Benning, GA, September 9-10, 2009.]

So, I’m now out of basic training and think I’ll do an initial reflection on the experience. I say initial because the whole thing happened so fast that the thoughts are still kind of settling in my mind and I very well may change my impression in the near future as I go through letters I sent home and talk to other guys who were with me.

Overall I think that basic training was essentially just what it was supposed to be. It was very challenging and I came out much more a soldier than I left. It wasn’t just a weapons proficiency course, a workout program, a crucible to weed out the weak or a rite of passage. Basic training contained elements of all of these things but it was a very dynamic experience with a very intricate set of lessons and tasks.

They told us at the beginning that the focus of basic training had changed. It used to be that basic training was mainly intended to break you down and discipline you so that you largely became a tool of your superiors. It was louder, harsher and more physically demanding. And, from what we were told, largely counterproductive for the type of war we fight now. Basic training created soldiers that were tough and capable but “risk averse.” The example we were given was that now the Army needs soldiers who are willing to think and respond on their own instead of soldiers who ignore warning signs of IEDs and suspicious behavior because of waiting for orders. We were also told that the main focus now is the “intangibles” which includes things like being disciplined, working as a team, etc. This to me seems like a much better system and far more productive but I didn’t feel like things really happened that way. We had a lot of guys who graduated that definitely did not seem to have those traits when they left.

That brings me to the only real issue I had with basic training. The way problems are dealt with at basic training creates a very bizarre version of justice. In the normal world we learn that incentives matter and that when you do what people want of you you’ll be rewarded and vice versa. In basic training it’s nearly the opposite. If you do what you’re told you end up being known better and your life is worse plus you end up doing more work in the process. Also, you learn that the drill sergeants’ mood is the biggest factor in your punishment for anything. If he’s in a good mood we had guys get away with smuggling cell phones into the bay where if he was in a bad mood you could get screwed for anything. Granted, our drill sergeants honestly were very professional and did a good job of tempering their reactions but it was still not evenhanded.

I found though that I learned a great deal just the same. I learned to appreciate rank, to act with the proper respect towards others, that God and men all have your back if you do what you’re supposed to and that I am far more capable in many ways than I realized before. I learned these lessons over and over again, which is good because I realized that I am also very hardheaded. Basic training helped prove to me that I often need to be told over and over again before I will stick to a life lesson. I also learned that your attitude is not a product of your environment like you would assume. Whether or not you’re happy is entirely up to you whether life sucks or not. We got to the point that we were able to laugh during smokings and I was able to maintain morale through CS attacks. For the most part this meant simply not hitting low points and not adding to all of your emotional sine wave. It was like I installed an emotional rectifier while I was at basic training which I find interesting.

I did learn one lesson that was disappointing though. Any organization that exists for the sake of battle is guaranteed to be pumped overly full of testosterone. This makes life interesting and generally fun but it also creates some problems. There is very little difference between the day to day behavior of many of our soldiers and our prison population. No matter how much I attempted to justify it and explain away the actions of my peers and cadre I couldn’t do it. There is a great deal of honor in the job that most of these people do, the cause they fight for, the things they accomplish and the regulations they are supposed to follow. If the Army actually operated according to its doctrine it would actually be the organization you hope it is. Unfortunately, too many people slip through and too many people break from what they’re meant to be doing and it has disgusting results. Many of the people I’ve been with and I have had this conversation over and over again. It drives them nuts as much as it does me. Now, it isn’t all of the members that this applies to, in fact it’s a somewhat small percentage but it is far more people than I would hope. We've found a different sort of people at the various bases my buddies and I are scattered over then we all spent our time with at the RSP back in Idaho. Maybe they simply take the honorable ones and stuff recruiting and retention with them but I sure hope it wasn’t simply an illusion. We’ll see how I feel when I get back to my unit.

Overall, I’m still proud of my decision to do this job with this organization. Through the US military I still believe one can have a greater impact for good then with any other organization. I also still believe that the Army as a whole is greatly good and has a value set as good as any other group out there. My only regret is that the Army has a sad little group of people to choose from. Unfortunately most of the people who would follow the rules and make the Army what it’s supposed to be are unwilling to be a part of it. One of the jokes that went around are platoon was that the real reason the Army’s uniform is green is that the only people willing to defend our country are potheads despite the fact that society in general frowns on the use of weed. Why is it that the people who could make a difference in the direction, actions, and overall maturity our armed forces are willing to do no more to support our troops then slap a magnet on their car telling others to do so? Why is it that all the people who could make a difference all have something better to do? Why is it that “support our troops” seems to mean nothing more than put a flag in your front yard while you cheat on your husband that just deployed? As much as the men and women I dealt with often disgusted me, the men and women I was cut off from often disgusted me even more. It is difficult to keep from becoming cynical about the country we live in and what goes on in our world every day. But, in the end it goes back to having a good attitude about things simply because you do. I know that I still love my country. I love the fact that I can come and learn these things. I love the opportunities that I have here whether the people I would like to take advantage with them with me do so or not. When I originally joined the Army it was essentially because of two things. Pride and a desire to do something I could be proud of. I held and still hold a great deal of pride in my country and its ideals and what it stands for. I held and still hold a great deal of pride in our armed forces as a whole and what they do every day. I held and still hold a great deal of pride in myself and what I’m able to accomplish when given the tools and the training to succeed. I wished and still wish to do something with myself that would make a positive difference in society and I believed and still believe that I can be of great worth with the help of the US Army. Nothing’s changed in those respects. What has changed is that all of my reasoning has become more self-centered. My pride in my country does not stem from a commonality with everyone else in it or a sense that everything is good. Instead it now stems from the knowledge that the basic tenants of our country match what I believe a nation should hold. It also stems from the fact that I am able to do those things that I feel are right because of the freedoms that our nation is built on. Simply because the final result deviates from the master plan doesn’t mean that the plan was bad to begin with. It simply means that we need to keep working to fix the problems that have arisen as the plan was carried out. And that’s what I’ve learned to deal with. The Soldiers’ Creed claims that a soldier is disciplined, physically and mentally tough. I certainly learned discipline and moved further down the road to physical toughness at basic training and I’m hoping the ability to cope with whatever is thrown at you is the mental toughness that is described. If so, I guess basic training was effective and the intangibles spoken of in the beginning were taught appropriately.